the days of my life-µÚ39ÕÂ
°´¼üÅÌÉÏ·½Ïò¼ü ¡û »ò ¡ú ¿É¿ìËÙÉÏÏ·ҳ£¬°´¼üÅÌÉ쵀 Enter ¼ü¿É»Øµ½±¾ÊéĿ¼ҳ£¬°´¼üÅÌÉÏ·½Ïò¼ü ¡ü ¿É»Øµ½±¾Ò³¶¥²¿£¡
¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ªÎ´ÔĶÁÍꣿ¼ÓÈëÊéÇ©ÒѱãÏ´μÌÐøÔĶÁ£¡
hem¡¡since¡¡in¡¡this¡¡connection£»¡¡and¡¡how¡¡we¡¡came¡¡to¡¡have¡¡them¡¡I¡¡do¡¡not¡¡quite¡¡know¡£¡¡I¡¡can¡¡see¡¡them¡¡now¡¡in¡¡their¡¡gay¡¡dress¡¡and¡¡velvet¡¡caps¡¡touching¡¡up¡¡the¡¡grey¡¡steeds¡¡with¡¡their¡¡short¡¡whips¡£¡¡We¡¡made¡¡quite¡¡a¡¡sensation¡¡on¡¡our¡¡thirteen¡mile¡¡journey¡¡to¡¡and¡¡through¡¡Norwich£»¡¡but¡¡oh£¡¡¡were¡¡we¡¡not¡¡glad¡¡when¡¡it¡¡was¡¡all¡¡over¡£
In¡¡a¡¡letter¡¡recently¡¡found¡¡at¡¡Bradenham£»¡¡headed¡¡Ditchingham¡¡House£»¡¡Bungay£»¡¡December¡¡21£»¡¡1879£»¡¡and¡¡addressed¡¡to¡¡my¡¡brother¡¡William£»¡¡who¡¡was¡¡then¡¡attached¡¡to¡¡the¡¡British¡¡Embassy¡¡at¡¡Teheran£»¡¡I¡¡find¡¡the¡¡following¡¡estimate¡¡of¡¡my¡¡future¡¡wife¡¯s¡¡character£»¡¡and¡¡expression¡¡of¡¡my¡¡feelings¡¡towards¡¡her¡£
Next£»¡¡my¡¡dear¡¡Will¡¡¡ª¡¡je¡¡vais¡¡me¡¡marier¡¡¡ª¡¡to¡¡such¡¡a¡¡brick¡¡of¡¡a¡¡girl£»¡¡Louie¡¡Margitson¡£¡¡They¡¡are¡¡certain¡¡to¡¡have¡¡told¡¡you¡¡all¡¡about¡¡her¡¡in¡¡their¡¡letters¡¡from¡¡home£»¡¡so¡¡I¡¡will¡¡only¡¡say¡¡that¡¡I¡¡love¡¡her¡¡sincerely£»¡¡as¡¡I¡¡think¡¡she¡¡does¡¡me£»¡¡and¡¡that£»¡¡unless¡¡something¡¡untoward¡¡occurs¡¡to¡¡dash¡¡the¡¡cup¡¡from¡¡my¡¡lips£»¡¡I¡¡think¡¡we¡¡have¡¡as¡¡good¡¡a¡¡prospect¡¡of¡¡happiness¡¡as¡¡most¡¡people¡£¡¡She¡¡is¡¡good¡¡and¡¡sensible¡¡and¡¡true¡hearted£»¡¡and¡¡every¡¡day¡¡I¡¡see¡¡her¡¡I¡¡love¡¡and¡¡respect¡¡her¡¡more¡£¡¡She¡¡is¡¡a¡¡woman¡¡who¡¡can¡¡be¡¡a¡¡man¡¯s¡¡friend¡¡as¡¡well¡¡as¡¡his¡¡lover£»¡¡and¡¡whom¡¡I¡¡would¡¡trust¡¡as¡¡I¡¡would¡¡very¡¡few¡£¡¡She¡¡is¡¡willing¡¡to¡¡e¡¡to¡¡Africa£»¡¡so¡¡we¡¡propose¡¡returning¡¡there¡¡shortly£»¡¡i¡£e¡£¡¡as¡¡soon¡¡as¡¡we¡¡can¡¡get¡¡satisfactorily¡¡married¡£¡¡There¡¡is¡¡property¡¡concerned£»¡¡and¡¡trustees£»¡¡who£»¡¡as¡¡I¡¡dare¡¡say¡¡you¡¡know£»¡¡are¡¡gentry¡¡difficult¡¡to¡¡deal¡¡with¡£¡¡They¡¡want¡¡us¡¡to¡¡postpone¡¡the¡¡marriage¡¡till¡¡she¡¡es¡¡of¡¡age¡¡next¡¡October£»¡¡but¡¡we¡¡don¡¯t¡¡see¡¡the¡¡force¡¡of¡¡it¡¡in¡¡any¡¡way¡£¡¡I¡¡want¡¡to¡¡get¡¡married¡¡next¡¡April¡¡¡ª¡¡whether¡¡I¡¡shall¡¡manage¡¡or¡¡not¡¡is¡¡another¡¡matter¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£
Good¡bye£»¡¡old¡¡fellow¡£¡¡God¡¡bless¡¡you¡£
Your¡¡loving¡¡brother£»
H¡£¡¡Rider¡¡Haggard¡£
In¡¡fact£»¡¡as¡¡I¡¡have¡¡said£»¡¡we¡¡did¡¡not¡¡succeed¡¡in¡¡marrying¡¡until¡¡August¡¡11£»¡¡1880¡£
The¡¡circumstance¡¡of¡¡my¡¡marriage¡¡gave¡¡me¡¡pause¡¡as¡¡to¡¡my¡¡plan¡¡of¡¡leading¡¡a¡¡farmer¡¯s¡¡life¡¡in¡¡South¡¡Africa£»¡¡and¡¡as¡¡my¡¡father¡¡and¡¡family¡¡were¡¡very¡¡anxious¡¡that¡¡I¡¡should¡¡re¡enter¡¡the¡¡Colonial¡¡Service£»¡¡I¡¡made¡¡some¡¡attempt¡¡to¡¡do¡¡so¡£¡¡It¡¡is£»¡¡however£»¡¡one¡¡thing¡¡to¡¡give¡¡up¡¡a¡¡billet¡¡and¡¡quite¡¡another¡¡to¡¡get¡¡it¡¡back¡¡again¡£¡¡Had¡¡Sir¡¡Theophilus¡¡Shepstone¡¡or¡¡even¡¡Sir¡¡Owen¡¡Lanyon¡¡still¡¡been¡¡in¡¡power¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Transvaal£»¡¡doubtless¡¡there¡¡would¡¡have¡¡been¡¡little¡¡difficulty¡£¡¡But¡¡a¡¡new¡¡Pharaoh¡¡had¡¡arisen¡¡in¡¡the¡¡shape¡¡of¡¡Sir¡¡Gar¡¡Wolseley¡¡who¡¡knew¡¡not¡¡Joseph£»¡¡and¡¡probably¡¡wished¡¡to¡¡keep¡¡any¡¡available¡¡patronage¡¡in¡¡his¡¡own¡¡hands¡£¡¡At¡¡any¡¡rate£»¡¡on¡¡the¡¡matter¡¡being¡¡referred¡¡to¡¡him£»¡¡he¡¡replied¡¡¡°that¡¡arrangements¡¡are¡¡in¡¡contemplation¡¡which¡¡prevent¡¡your¡¡reinstatement¡¡in¡¡the¡¡office¡¡of¡¡Master¡¡of¡¡the¡¡High¡¡Court¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Transvaal¡£¡±
Those¡¡¡°arrangements¡±¡¡were¡¡indeed¡¡a¡¡blessing¡¡in¡¡disguise£»¡¡since£»¡¡had¡¡I¡¡been¡¡reinstated£»¡¡we¡¡should¡¡have¡¡had¡¡the¡¡pleasure£»¡¡as¡¡I¡¡have¡¡shown£»¡¡of¡¡going¡¡through¡¡the¡¡siege¡¡of¡¡Pretoria£»¡¡and¡¡on¡¡the¡¡Retrocession¡¡I¡¡should¡¡have¡¡been¡¡dismissed¡¡from¡¡my¡¡office¡¡without¡¡pensation£»¡¡as¡¡I¡¡believe¡¡happened¡¡to¡¡the¡¡gentleman¡¡who¡¡succeeded¡¡me¡£¡¡It¡¡was¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡peculiar¡¡cruelties¡¡of¡¡that¡¡act¡¡that¡¡Englishmen¡¡who¡¡had¡¡taken¡¡service¡¡under¡¡the¡¡British¡¡Government¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Transvaal¡¡were¡¡treated¡¡thus£»¡¡since£»¡¡of¡¡course£»¡¡even¡¡if¡¡the¡¡opportunity¡¡had¡¡been¡¡given£»¡¡they¡¡could¡¡scarcely¡¡transfer¡¡their¡¡allegiance¡¡from¡¡the¡¡Queen¡¡to¡¡a¡¡Boer¡¡Republic¡£¡¡But£»¡¡after¡¡all£»¡¡they¡¡suffered¡¡no¡¡worse¡¡things¡¡than¡¡scores¡¡of¡¡British¡¡subjects¡¡whose¡¡farms¡¡were¡¡looted£»¡¡and¡¡who¡¡in¡¡practice¡¡were¡¡left¡¡to¡¡send¡¡in¡¡their¡¡bill¡¡to¡¡their¡¡new¡¡Dutch¡¡masters¡¡¡ª¡¡with¡¡results¡¡that¡¡may¡¡be¡¡imagined¡£
When¡¡I¡¡went¡¡home¡¡in¡¡1879¡¡Mr¡£¡¡£¨or£»¡¡as¡¡he¡¡afterwards¡¡became£»¡¡Sir¡¡Melmoth£©¡¡Obsorn¡¡entrusted¡¡me¡¡with¡¡the¡¡guardianship¡¡of¡¡his¡¡son¡¡Jack£»¡¡a¡¡boy¡¡of¡¡about¡¡sixteen£»¡¡whom¡¡he¡¡asked¡¡me¡¡to¡¡send¡¡to¡¡whatever¡¡school¡¡I¡¡might¡¡select¡¡in¡¡England¡£¡¡So¡¡it¡¡es¡¡about¡¡that¡¡he¡¡wrote¡¡me¡¡a¡¡good¡¡many¡¡letters£»¡¡a¡¡few¡¡of¡¡which¡¡survive¡¡and¡¡contain¡¡items¡¡of¡¡interest¡¡as¡¡to¡¡public¡¡affairs¡¡in¡¡Africa¡¡at¡¡this¡¡period¡£
Poor¡¡Jack¡¡Osborn¡¡after¡¡a¡¡course¡¡of¡¡education¡¡in¡¡England¡¡returned¡¡to¡¡South¡¡Africa¡¡and¡¡was¡¡appointed¡¡to¡¡some¡¡office¡¡in¡¡Zululand¡£¡¡There£»¡¡a¡¡few¡¡years¡¡later£»¡¡he¡¡died¡¡of¡¡abscess¡¡of¡¡the¡¡liver¡£
In¡¡a¡¡letter¡¡dated¡¡Pretoria£»¡¡October¡¡10£»¡¡1879£»¡¡Osborn¡¡says£º
I¡¡have¡¡your¡¡letter¡¡23rd¡¡August¡¡in¡¡which¡¡you¡¡give¡¡account¡¡of¡¡your¡¡stewardship¡¡regarding¡¡Jack¡£¡¡Accept¡¡my¡¡sincere¡¡thanks¡¡for¡¡all¡¡you¡¡have¡¡done¡¡and¡¡the¡¡care¡¡you¡¡took¡¡of¡¡the¡¡boy£»¡¡who¡¡I¡¡fear¡¡must¡¡have¡¡been¡¡a¡¡great¡¡bother¡¡to¡¡you¡£¡¡Your¡¡father¡¯s¡¡kind¡¡note¡¡to¡¡me¡¡I¡¡need¡¡not¡¡tell¡¡you¡¡how¡¡greatly¡¡I¡¡appreciate£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡will¡¡write¡¡to¡¡him¡¡by¡¡this¡¡mail¡£¡¡Jack¡¡wrote¡¡me¡¡several¡¡letters¡¡since¡¡his¡¡arrival¡¡in¡¡England¡£¡¡He¡¡is¡¡loud¡¡about¡¡all¡¡the¡¡kindness¡¡shown¡¡him¡¡by¡¡you¡¡and¡¡your¡¡people£»¡¡your¡¡father¡¡especially£»¡¡whom¡¡he¡¡seems¡¡to¡¡swear¡¡by¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡Sir¡¡Gar¡¡Wolseley¡¡is¡¡here¡£¡¡He¡¡would¡¡not¡¡take¡¡up¡¡his¡¡abode¡¡in¡¡Government¡¡House£»¡¡but¡¡had¡¡a¡¡house¡¡hired¡¡for¡¡his¡¡occupation£»¡¡and¡¡is¡¡now¡¡in¡¡Koch¡¯s¡¡new¡¡residence¡¡near¡¡Melville¡¯s£»¡¡together¡¡with¡¡his¡¡staff¡£¡¡I¡¡have¡¡a¡¡very¡¡hard¡¡time¡¡of¡¡it¡¡just¡¡now£»¡¡having¡¡to¡¡serve¡¡two¡¡masters¡¡who£»¡¡between¡¡us£»¡¡do¡¡not¡¡seem¡¡to¡¡pull¡¡together¡¡very¡¡well¡£¡¡Sir¡¡Gar¡¡seems¡¡to¡¡disapprove¡¡entirely¡¡of¡¡Sir¡¡Bartle¡¡Frere¡¯s¡¡policy¡¡with¡¡Kaffirs¡¡and¡¡Boers¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£
With¡¡regard¡¡to¡¡your¡¡returning¡¡to¡¡the¡¡Colonial¡¡Service¡¡your¡¡father¡¡is¡¡quite¡¡right£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡think¡¡you¡¡should¡¡return¡£¡¡The¡¡business¡¡between¡¡you¡¡and¡¡Cochrane¡¡could¡¡be¡¡easily¡¡arranged£»¡¡although¡¡I¡¡dare¡¡say¡¡to¡¡you¡¡there¡¡seems¡¡a¡¡difficulty¡¡about¡¡it¡£¡¡If¡¡you¡¡start¡¡again¡¡fairly¡¡in¡¡any¡¡other¡¡colony¡¡but¡¡this¡¡you¡¡are¡¡sure¡¡to¡¡succeed£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡strongly¡¡advise¡¡you¡¡to¡¡do¡¡so¡¡¡ª¡¡it¡¡would¡¡simply¡¡be¡¡following¡¡a¡¡pursuit¡¡for¡¡which¡¡you¡¡are¡¡eminently¡¡suited¡¡and¡¡abandoning¡¡one¡¡for¡¡which¡¡you¡¡are¡¡not¡£¡¡I¡¡think¡¡I¡¡told¡¡you¡¡that¡¡I¡¡did¡¡the¡¡same¡¡thing¡¡some¡¡years¡¡ago£º¡¡resigned¡¡my¡¡appointment¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Service¡¡and¡¡invested¡¡in¡¡a¡¡sugar¡¡estate£»¡¡but¡¡soon¡¡found¡¡that¡¡trying¡¡to¡¡do¡¡that¡¡which¡¡I¡¡did¡¡not¡¡understand¡¡involved¡¡nothing¡¡but¡¡loss£»¡¡and¡¡by¡¡advice¡¡of¡¡a¡¡friend¡¡I¡¡re¡entered¡¡the¡¡Service£»¡¡tho¡¯¡¡in¡¡a¡¡low¡¡grade¡£¡¡Well£»¡¡by¡¡steady¡¡perseverance¡¡and¡¡without¡¡one¡half¡¡the¡¡advantages¡¡you¡¡have£»¡¡here¡¡I¡¡am¡¡today¡£¡¡Perhaps¡¡you¡¡will¡¡say¡¡it¡¡is¡¡not¡¡much¡¡after¡¡all£»¡¡but¡¡if¡¡you¡¡had¡¡to¡¡encounter¡¡all¡¡the¡¡uphill¡¡work¡¡that¡¡fell¡¡to¡¡my¡¡lot¡¡of¡¡which¡¡you¡¡have¡¡no¡¡conception£»¡¡and¡¡when¡¡you¡¡are¡¡a¡¡little¡¡older£»¡¡you¡¡will¡¡be¡¡able¡¡to¡¡appreciate¡¡matters¡¡as¡¡I¡¡do¡£
I¡¡have¡¡but¡¡little¡¡news¡¡to¡¡send¡¡you¡¡this¡¡time¡£¡¡Two¡¡regiments¡¡are¡¡expected¡¡here¡¡in¡¡a¡¡few¡¡days¡¡I¡¡believe£»¡¡so¡¡that¡¡we¡¡will¡¡have¡¡a¡¡lot¡¡of¡¡troops¡¡at¡¡hand¡¡to¡¡cope¡¡with¡¡the¡¡Amabull¡¡£§a¡¡slang¡¡name¡¡for¡¡the¡¡Boers¡£¡¡¡ª¡¡H¡£¡¡R¡£¡¡H¡££§¡¡or¡¡any¡¡other¡¡obstreperous¡¡bulls¡¡who¡¡might¡¡trouble¡¡us¡£¡¡Last¡¡evening¡¡I¡¡heard¡¡from¡¡Middelburg¡¡that¡¡the¡¡Boers¡¡there¡¡are¡¡very¡¡violent¡¡and¡¡the¡¡Landdrost¡¡Scoble¡¡was¡¡anticipating¡¡serious¡¡results¡£¡¡All¡¡these¡¡things¡¡happening¡¡so¡¡continually¡¡worry¡¡me¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡am¡¡heartily¡¡sick¡¡of¡¡it¡¡all¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£¡¡¡£
Ever¡¡your¡¡affectionate¡¡friend£»
M¡£¡¡Osborn¡£
The¡¡next¡¡letter¡¡is¡¡headed¡¡Zululand£»¡¡April¡¡14£»¡¡1880¡£
My¡¡post¡¡runner¡¡brought¡¡me¡¡your¡¡very¡¡wele¡¡letter¡¡of¡¡3¡¡February¡¡yesterday¡£¡¡I¡¡was¡¡very¡¡glad¡¡to¡¡get¡¡it¡¡and¡¡to¡¡hear¡¡that¡¡all¡¡was¡¡well¡¡with¡¡you¡£¡¡Before¡¡proceeding¡¡to¡¡business¡¡matters¡¡I¡¡must¡¡offer¡¡you¡¡my¡¡sincere¡¡and¡¡hearty¡¡congratulations¡¡on¡¡the¡¡prospect¡¡of¡¡happiness¡¡before¡¡you¡£¡¡Depend¡¡upon¡¡it¡¡you¡¡are¡¡doing¡¡the¡¡right¡¡thing¡£¡¡A¡¡man¡¡is¡¡nothing¡¡in¡¡this¡¡life¡¡who¡¡has¡¡no¡¡wife¡¡to¡¡love¡¡or¡¡be¡¡loved¡¡by£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡feel¡¡certain¡¡that¡¡you¡¡have¡¡not¡¡erred¡¡in¡¡your¡¡selection¡¡and¡¡that¡¡the¡¡young¡¡lady¡¡will¡¡prove¡¡not¡¡only¡¡worthy¡¡of¡¡your¡¡affection¡¡but¡¡a¡¡great¡¡stay¡¡and¡¡support¡¡through¡¡life¡£
I¡¡write¡¡this¡¡from¡¡the¡¡heart¡¡of¡¡Zululand£»¡¡where¡¡I¡¡hold¡¡the¡¡office¡¡of¡¡British¡¡Resident¡£¡¡My¡¡duties¡¡are¡¡chiefly¡¡to¡¡supervise¡¡the¡¡action¡¡of¡¡the¡¡thirteen¡¡chiefs¡¡to¡¡whom¡¡the¡¡country¡¡has¡¡been¡¡given£»¡¡their¡¡government¡¡and¡¡the¡¡way¡¡they¡¡fulfil¡¡the¡¡treaty¡¡obligations¡£¡¡I¡¡am¡¡entirely¡¡on¡¡my¡¡own¡¡responsibility¡¡and¡¡have¡¡to¡¡do¡¡just¡¡as¡¡appears¡¡right¡¡to¡¡me¡£¡¡And¡¡a¡¡proper¡¡responsibility¡¡I¡¡find¡¡it¡£¡¡Indeed¡¡it¡¡is¡¡no¡¡joke¡£¡¡I¡¡am¡¡not¡¡hard¡¡worked£»¡¡but¡¡my¡¡brain¡¡is¡¡continually¡¡on¡¡the¡¡stretch¡¡to¡¡prevent¡¡the¡¡wily¡¡Zulu¡¡getting¡¡the¡¡better¡¡of¡¡me¡£¡¡Any¡¡mistake¡¡might¡¡cause¡¡endless¡¡plications¡£¡¡My¡¡pay¡¡is¡¡1300¡¡pounds£»¡¡and¡¡a¡¡suitable¡¡Residency¡¡is¡¡to¡¡be¡¡built¡¡at¡¡once¡¡for¡¡me¡¡by¡¡the¡¡Government¡£¡¡I¡¡correspond¡¡only¡¡with¡¡the¡¡High¡¡missioner¡¡direct¡£¡¡I¡¡had¡¡not¡¡forgotten¡¡you¡¡when¡¡the¡¡appointment¡¡was¡¡made£»¡¡but¡¡there¡¡was¡¡nothing¡¡at¡¡all¡¡beyond¡¡an¡¡ordinary¡¡clerkship¡¡which¡¡I¡¡could¡¡offer¡¡you£»¡¡and¡¡this¡¡was¡¡certainly¡¡not¡¡in¡¡your¡¡line¡£¡¡There¡¡is¡¡however¡¡a¡¡good¡¡prospect¡¡of¡¡something¡¡worth¡¡having¡¡turning¡¡up¡¡in¡¡six¡¡months¡¡from¡¡this£»¡¡and¡¡then¡¡you¡¡will¡¡hear¡¡from¡¡me¡¡again¡£¡¡Between¡¡us¡¡I¡¡have¡¡to